In honor of today being the start of February (and therefore the lead up to celebrating Valentine’s Day), I’m sharing a fun quiz that offers insight into how you love in all of your relationships: familial, romantic, close friendships, etc. No need to officially be in a relationship to learn your Love Language (i.e. my single self took this quiz)!
I’m all for using tests and quizzes to learn more about myself and my loved ones. Whether it’s reading my horoscope (Scorpio – you can read about how I view my zodiac sign here) or assessing my Myers Briggs Personality (INTJ) or Enneagram Types (type 2w3) (both of which I’ll probably write posts about later on), I love using psychological and spiritual methods to learn more about myself. I’ve never been a devout follower who abides strictly by these categories, but I do believe that they can act as a guide to make us more aware of our strengths and weaknesses.
Finding my Love Language makes me more aware of how I interact with others, what I need in a healthy relationship, and identifying relationships that may be toxic or simply unfulfilling. Love Languages are all about how you interact with those you love – whether your relationships are familial, romantic, or friendships.
My Love Language type:
After taking the quiz I was told that the love language I connect with the most is “words of affirmation” followed closely by “acts of service.” I connected with this and feel it is incredibly accurate in how I approach relationships. I often need to hear the words of my family, friends, and significant other telling me that they appreciate me rather than simply buying me gifts or giving me a reassuring hug. I need to hear it to let it sink it – which is the mindset that probably also contributed to me being in my Communications field. And as for my “acts of service” language coming in second, I definitely appreciate when people share my burdens and help out to show that they care. I also recognize that this is how I interact with my loved ones – I genuinely enjoy helping friends with tasks and taking care of mundane things if it makes life easier for them!
For you all to reference, here are the Five Types of Love Languages:
Words of Affirmation
Actions don’t always speak louder than words. If this is your love language, unsolicited compliments mean the world to you. Hearing the words, “I love you,” are important— hearing the reasons behind that love sends your spirits skyward. Insults can leave you shattered and are not easily forgotten. You thrive on hearing kind and encouraging words that build you up.
Acts of Service
Can helping with homework really be an expression of love? Absolutely! Anything you do to ease the burden of responsibilities weighing on an “Acts of Service” person will speak volumes. The words he or she most wants to hear: “Let me do that for you.” Laziness, broken commitments, and making more work for them tell speakers of this language their feelings don’t matter. When others serve you out of love (and not obligation), you feel truly valued and loved.
In Quality Time, nothing says “I love you” like full, undivided attention. Being there for this type of person is critical, but really being there—with the TV off, fork and knife down, and all chores and tasks on standby—makes you feel truly special and loved. Distractions, postponed activities, or the failure to listen can be especially hurtful. Whether itʼs spending uninterrupted time talking with someone else or doing activities together, you deepen your connection with others through sharing time.
A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive. Appropriate and timely touches communicate warmth, safety, and love to you.
Don’t mistake this love language for materialism; the receiver of gifts thrives on the love, thoughtfulness, and effort behind the gift. If you speak this language, the perfect gift or gesture shows that you are known, you are cared for, and you are prized above whatever was sacrificed to bring the gift to you. A missed birthday or a hasty, thoughtless gift would be disastrous—so would the absence of everyday gestures. Gifts are heartfelt symbols to you of someone else’s love and affection for you.
Now that you’ve learned about the different ways to express how you care, what’s your love language?? Let me know in the comments!